By Modesty Yours

It’s not yet June, but already summer has started in Chicago-land which means that it’s time for sprinklers and splash pads and if we’re lucky, a few trips to the local water park. Of course all these activities require adequate swimwear.

My six-year-old son is no problem. He’s been wearing the same pair of Lightening McQueen swim trunks for the last three years. Somehow they still manage to fit, although they no longer reach to his knees like they did the first year.  Throw on a t-shirt for some extra sun and scratch protection and he’s set. Same goes for my husband. Trunks and a t-shirt and he’s ready to go.

I was fortunate enough to find a great, modest swimsuit for myself last fall. It’s both modest and fashionable, or at least what I consider fashionable, and it’s quite comfortable to wear. I happened upon it while looking at department store sales online and got it for a steal. (In case you’re interested, it’s a Miracle Suit.) It’s a relief for me to know that this year I won’t have to worry about my swimwear “situation” as I now feel confident knowing that I’ll be both adequately covered andcomfortable enough to have fun in the water.

Then there’s my daughter. She’s only three and already we have encountered difficulties when it comes to clothing her for swimming. I know many people would scoff at my dilemma but I don’t take lightly the challenge of teaching her from an early age that her body is special and for that reason we take special care to keep it safe and protected at all times. Unfortunately, bathing suit manufacturers don’t seem to share my concern and consequently most of what I found when I went shopping for her were not what I considered appropriate for a three-year-old.

I know to many a bikini on a little girl might seem cute. There’s nothing really to show-off on a three-year-old, and I don’t think maufacturers and parents are actively trying to sexualize their little girls. However, my husband and I both find the idea of toddler bikinis weird. If I’m not going to let my teen daughter wear a sexy bikini when she eventually does have something to show off, then why would I prep her for it by allowing her to wear one now? It’s not exactly fair to change the rules midstream.  And bikinis just don’t seem comfortable or practical for swimming and playing, espcially for little girls.

Of course I found it interesting that there were tons of these suits hanging on the racks in both the infant-toddler section and the girls section of the store, while the one suit I would have considered buying was nearly sold out. It was a board short + rash guard shirt combo and was just what I had in mind.  Apparently I wasn’t the only one since there was only one left, in the wrong size, of course.

There were quite a few two-pieces that included the rash-guard shirt and bikini bottoms, or bikini top with board short bottoms. I considered buying one of each, but the colors and sizes didn’t jive very well.  But the one combining the shorts and shirt? They were gone, stripped from shelves before summer has even officially begun!

Aren’t stores and manufacturers always taking account of the buying habits of their customers? Don’t they notice when the most modest and protective style of swimsuit sells out immediately? It seems like good business to get more. I’ve noticed this same pattern in the past….the most modest suits are the most difficult to find, and when you do find them they’ve inevitably sold out.

As it turns out, I managed to dig out an older suit that was given to us a hand-me-down from a friend, one I had forgotten about.  It’s a one-piece that fully covers both chest and bottom and while wasn’t my first choice, it will do. With a t-shirt over it for added protection, it should work pretty well.

Modesty takes work. It’s not convenient and often not cheap. But dignity and self-preservation go a long way when it comes to cultivating confidence in our daughters, something much of society forgets or ignores, especially when it comes to the simple act of dressing. For that reason I refuse to compromise. It’s just not worth it in the long run.

By Barb Ernster

At a time when exposed midriffs, pierced navels and tattooed backsides (and #freethenipple) are all the rage, the pressure is on young girls to grin and “bare” it.

Everywhere you turn, parents — their influence challenged by the onslaught of writhing pop idols on TV and the prevalence of racy attire at the shopping mall — are lamenting the loss of their daughters’ modesty.

“It used to be just the fringe people who dressed like that,” says Kathie Nalepa, who resides in Clarkston, Mich., with her husband and three children. “But [now] even the girls who want to do the right thing are feeling pressure.”

“Pure Fashion” shows hope to offer an antidote. One, co-organized by Nalepa, drew more than 600 mothers and daughters. Hosted by Challenge Clubs of Michigan, a faith youth organization, the show featured club members — girls in junior and senior high — modeling modest, but trendy, clothing.

The Michigan show was just one of many. Since Pure Fashion was launched in Minneapolis five years ago, Challenge Clubs in nine states have put on scores of similarly styled events under the Pure Fashion banner.

One of the best pieces of news to come out of the shows lately is that they’re attracting audiences not only from faith youth groups but also from a widening swath of the general public.

Pure Fashion is proving successful because it “speaks to virtues that are very necessary in today’s world, modesty and purity,” says Tammy Grady, a Regnum Christi consecrated woman who provides spiritual formation to members of Challenge Clubs in the Midwest. “We’re all a product of our environment. What the media portrays is fashionable. So there has to be a whole environment created that leads [young people] to the good, and it has to be ongoing.”

Since 1995, when the more outrageous styles started to emerge en masse (low-cut jeans with the top button undone, for example), retailers have more than doubled the floor space devoted to teen fashions. The market, they know, is ripe: Spending among 12- to 19-year-olds hit $170 billion last year, according to market-research firm Teen Research Unlimited, and 48% of the teens they surveyed said they plan to spend as much or more this year.

“You’re looking at a huge market. Companies like Abercrombie & Fitch and Victoria’s Secret know these young people, primarily girls, are interested in buying products and so they market them heavily,” says Teresa Tomeo, a former Detroit television news anchor who left the secular media in 2000. Today she speaks, writes and hosts a faith radio program with Jeff Cavins.

Coleen Kelly Mast who also spoke at the recent Michigan show, says Pure Fashion can impress upon young girls how important it is to consider how they present themselves to others. “You are a walking advertisement,” she says. “The type of clothing you wear will either advertise your body — or your values and beliefs as a person.”

“Teen-age girls often don’t realize what men and boys think and feel when they see girls dressed immodestly,” adds Mast. “Clothes that are tight, short, skimpy or transparent can be a real temptation for others to lust.”

Supply and Demand

Followers of the Bible are not the only ones doing something to stand up to (and out from) current styles. Last fall, a group of Mormon teens in Mesa, Ariz., wrote a petition asking Dillard’s department store to offer more modest clothing. Some 1,500 high-school students signed. The retailer responded quickly with a line of modest dresses — right in time for homecoming season, as it happened.

And Dillard’s at the Mall of Georgia, in Atlanta, provided clothing for Pure Fashion this year. When asked if the retailer was hearing from its customers about the current fashions, the store’s general manager, Michael Falabella, said those decisions are made at the buying level, and managers can’t do much about it. (Calls to Dillard’s corporate offices, and other retailers, were not returned.)

Kim Gibas, a Plymouth, Minn., mother whose daughter modeled for a Minneapolis Pure Fashion show, says it’s hard to make an impact on retailers “because there aren’t enough kids out there wanting to buy the stuff. Their sense of modesty is gone. Nobody thinks it’s wrong.”

Indeed, Tomeo says the relationship between the media and what’s happening in society is well documented. Studies by the American Academy of Pediatrics have found that half of the Saturday television commercials are aimed at young girls and focus on physical appearance. Other studies from the National Institute on Media & Family found that viewing MTV results in more permissive attitudes about sex and exposes youth to a tremendous amount of violence — particularly sexual violence against women.

The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality, says it is the duty of parents “to protect the young from the aggressions they are subjected to by the media. The practice of decency and modesty in speech, action and dress is very important for creating an atmosphere suitable to the growth of chastity, but this must be well motivated by respect for one’s own body and the dignity of others. Parents, as we have said, should be watchful so that certain immoral fashions and attitudes do not violate the integrity of the home, especially through misuse of the mass media…May no one shirk from this duty by using the excuse that he or she is not involved.”

Tomeo says getting involved is not difficult with the Internet at hand. Many Web sites are helping parents organize and give voice to their concerns. Not only are the sites good resources, but many also have petitions you can send online, along with pre-written letters, toll-free numbers and other means for action.

The Parents Television Council (http://www.parentstv.org) has 800,000 members that get the networks’ attention when they launch a campaign. Tomeo also recommends the American Decency Association (http://www.americandecency.org), the National Coalition for the Protection of Children and Families (http://www.nationalcoalition.org), www.lyrics.com and her own site, http://www.teresatomeo.com as go,od resources.

Mast says parents should begin modesty training at age 6 or 7, when they still control the money and shopping.

“Teaching modesty should be a normal part of the discipline of children on the road to self-mastery,” she says. “It can remind them of their inner dignity as a child of God.

Each time a child shops for or gets a new outfit, the question of modesty should be addressed. Children can begin to think about the statements they are making with their clothes.“

Nalepa marvels that actions taken, even small ones, can bring positive responses from teens. “I am convinced that kids want to be modest,” she says. “I think it’s a natural virtue. When modesty is presented as a good thing, they’re happy. They don’t want to worry about being sexual beings. They’re just kids.”

Barb Ernster writes from Fridley, Minnesota

For More info visit:
http://www.purefashion.com/experience

By Sasiwan Mokkhasen
Staff Reporter

BANGKOK — The biggest car show on the calendar rides into town next week, and with it the annual cry for decency from the appointed defenders of conservative culture.

Culture Minister Veera Rojpojanarat said his team had visited Grand Prix International PLC, organizer of Bangkok International Motor Show, to make sure that their models dress modestly.

“I believe they will fully cooperate as they welcomed us nicely when the team visited,” Veera said.

The expo is due to take place from Wednesday to April 3 at Impact Arena Muang Thong Thani.

One of such shows main draws to many are not the souped-up cars, but the sexed-up models who pose in revealing or scant clothing and attract swarms of amateur photographers.

Veera said he has received complaints from citizens who fear that these sexy models present a bad image of Thailand to the world, and present a bad example for children to imitate.

The ministry also proposed that the organizer change the models’s dresses to ones representing “Thainess,” he said.

By Daily Mail

Her latest role involves numerous steamy scenes, but Ruth Wilson says it’s unfair of TV bosses to expect actresses to appear topless. The English actress, who stars in American TV show The Affair, which is about be aired in the UK, said male and female actors are treated differently when they film sex scenes – and it is the women who are expected to provide the titillation. The 33-year-old added that she has a ‘big concern about how women are treated in the industry generally’.

Her latest role involves numerous steamy scenes, but Ruth Wilson says it’s unfair of TV bosses to expect actresses to appear topless.

The English actress, who stars in American TV show The Affair, which is about be aired in the UK, said male and female actors are treated differently when they film sex scenes – and it is the women who are expected to provide the titillation.

The 33-year-old added that she has a ‘big concern about how women are treated in the industry generally’.

Miss Wilson said she accepted the sex scenes in The Affair because they was justified by the plot, which follows an intense extramarital relationship. But the actress, who won a Golden Globe for her role in the series, said she is appalled by the focus in her industry on women’s bodies during such scenes.

She said: ‘It’s assumed that women will get their breasts out and have to get their breasts out and I baulk at that. It’s unnecessary and it’s unfair.’

She added that during filming for The Affair she kept insisting: ‘Why have I always got to do the orgasm face? There should be a male orgasm face. Why is it always the woman who’s orgasming?’
The series, which also stars fellow British actor Dominic West and was a huge hit in the US, begins airing in the UK on Sky Atlantic later this month, meaning that the former convent schoolgirl from Surrey has so far avoided the awkwardness of her parents – Mary, a probation officer, and Nigel, an investment banker – seeing the scenes

She told the Radio Times: ‘When it does come out I’ll leave the country. It’s vulnerable. You’re naked and you’re in this situation and you know your family is going to have to watch it. I can’t cope.’

Miss Wilson also revealed she hated going to drama club as a child because she was ‘so shy’.

‘I went to a drama club that my brothers went to, and I enjoyed it, but I also hated it,’ she said.

But she decided to pursue acting as she loved performing and has gone on to star in hit shows including crime series Luther, a BBC TV adaptation of Jane Eyre and Disney film Saving Mr Bank